Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
