She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
