You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
