You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
