Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
