i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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