its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
