the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
