I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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