it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you win again, gameday.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
