Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
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