You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
