Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
