real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
