He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
