Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
We talked him into tasing himself.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
