I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Randomize
