why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
