I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
