She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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