youre lurking in front of me
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You pole danced in your parka.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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