This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Randomize
