Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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