addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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