He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
