On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
