Non-Jews are for practice
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
