is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
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