part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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