Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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