i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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