yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
