TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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