So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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