He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
