Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Randomize
