how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
