Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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