My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
