Your tits are I can't wait for
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
