Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
