I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
