wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Buhtt sex?
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Blood and glitter go together right?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
My vagina is very pro this idea
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
