Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize