Fuck appropriateness.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
