If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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