i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
