hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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