you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Your penis caused this!
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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