youre lurking in front of me
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
